October;
Tom. Odd from the start. We met at Dunks. Lots of baggage, no car, endless family drama. We talked a few more times, then he vanished. No loss.
Ken. Dinner was fine, but he was glued to his phone. Came back to my place and immediately pushed for more. I went along with it and instantly regretted it. Spent the next week dodging his calls.
Joe. Great dinner, great conversation. Later that night he called from bed, things got flirty, then he abruptly hung up and disappeared forever. Honestly… fitting.
John. Young, confident, pretty-boy energy. Former model, now a pool player. Made us pizza, then got way too comfortable on my couch. Things happened, it was fine, and he seemed eager to see me again — until he ghosted. Months later he texted from a “new number.” Deleted.
November:
Rick. Still no word. Blocked.
Liam. Intense. Persistent. We planned to meet at a restaurant. I got there; he texted saying he was “taking a quick shower.” An hour passed. Then another. I waited two hours in a freezing car before blocking him and leaving. My first time being stood up — hated it.
Brian. Props for persistence. After I blocked him, he texted from a friend’s phone. We played a little guessing game before he admitted who he was. Eventually we met. Chemistry was strong, timing was not. He talks mostly about sex, asked me to be his girlfriend, and somehow survived my Facebook dating massacre. Still complicated.
Omar. Nice dinner, good conversation. He didn’t have enough cash, so I paid half. Then he suggested a hotel. Things moved too fast, too awkwardly, and afterward he went straight to sleep. I left at 4 a.m. and never spoke to him again.
Karim. A disaster from the moment I walked in. Messy room, uncomfortable vibe, pushy energy. The whole night felt wrong. I left shaken and blocked him immediately. Mortifying. I felt used and invaded.
Jay, Paul, Rob, were forgettable. Rob lived in NY — sweet, but too far. We drifted.
Dav, So sweet. English was rough, but he was kind. We ate takeout in his car, talked, then went to his place. Things were gentle, simple. I saw him twice. When I left, he quietly put $20 in my hand. I felt awful — like I’d been reduced to a transaction. He still texts kindly, but I want more than casual hookups.
Herman, Barely spoke. Boring. Blocked.
Ryan, Met at Dunkin’. Huge guy — intimidating at first, but sweet, smart, charming. We connected fast. Spent time together, but he was still married and emotionally tangled. Every conversation circled back to his wife. After Christmas he texted that he needed to “go dark.” Dumped me politely. I still think about him sometimes — part longing, part anger.
January;
A blur of names I barely remember. Quick likes, short texts, nothing meaningful. A manic rotation of men who passed through my life without ever really seeing me.
Men who had no idea how unhinged I was. Men who drifted through my mania‑fueled “am I pretty enough, smart enough, interesting enough?” months.
This isn’t a love story. It’s not even a dating story. It’s a survival story disguised as a roster.
A lineup of men who floated through while I was trying to figure out if I was enough — a chapter I still haven’t fully made peace with.
More soon, when my mind cooperates.
K. Unsupervised
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I'm Still Here. Somehow... 